ASHTIN :: MOTHERHOOD
What was it like to find out your were pregnant? It was so scary and exciting all at once. It really didn't even feel real that I was pregnant until I felt her move inside of me. Her little feet kicking under my ribs. I enjoyed her little movements. There are no words to describe the feeling of your child growing inside of you. It is simply the most amazing thing to experience.
Describe how it felt the first time you held Avery in your arms: I felt whole when I first held Avery. Like everything in my life that didn't have meaning made sense. I remember my parents came in when I was holding her and my boyfriend was in the room too, but it felt as if it was just Avery and I in the room together. Like everything stopped moving, except her and I. I would love to relive that moment.
How has being a mom changed you as a person? I put more thought into everything I do. I actually notice a lot more and cherish everything so much more. My daughter has made so much stronger. I used to hate mornings but with Avery that has changed. Every morning I wake up to this happy baby girl.
What’s the best part about being a mom? Being her mommy. Knowing that she is mine and I am hers and that will never change. She is the best of me.
What’s the most challenging thing? The days where nothing seems to satisfy her can be very difficult. Sometimes I am not sure how I will ever get through those days but I always do.
What has taken you by surprise about motherhood? What do you wish someone would have filled you in on beforehand? Everyone always told me how much it will change your life. I never really listened and understood. Now I believe them. Now I understand what they were trying to tell me.
What do you most wish you could hold onto forever about Avery being little? The one thing I want to hold onto is how I am her world. I know those teenage years will come, when I am the last person she will want to be around. So I just want to hold on to me being her whole world.
What do you hope Avery grows up to become? What type of humans are you trying to raise? I want her to be strong and confident. I want her to take precautions in everything she does. If she has goals and dreams I want her to go for them no matter what.
If you could give a word of advice or encouragement to other moms, what would it be? Sometimes it'll seem like it is never going to get better but there is always tomorrow. Even if it takes weeks or months it'll always get better.
Funny story you love to tell about being a mom: The first night in the hospital, it was just her father and I, alone with this brand new baby. We decided to keep her in our room for the night. She cried all night long unless I was holding her. So I stayed up all night long holding her. I had no idea what I was doing.